Intimacy & Sex

Will a Man Actually Fake His Climax?

It seems ridiculous, but you have this strange little idea bopping around in your head that maybe (and this is such a weird thought) he didn’t come. Nah, that can’t be the case, you think. Guys ALWAYS finish. Don’t they?

Did he just fake his climax?

It seemed like great sex – from the spicy-hot text messages he was sending to you all day to that amazing post-work back rub, which turned into a steamy, sexy evening filled with all your favorites.

It felt like he did it all for you – and you lapped up every delicious minute of it.

And in the sweaty, glowing aftermath, a really odd thought sneaks up in your head. You begin to wonder…

Did he really ejaculate? You couldn’t exactly tell. The sounds and motions seemed right, but the, erm, fluids could all have been yours.

Will a man really fake his climax?? But why would he?

“Dear Claire, this is a little weird. Please change my name if you publish this one :o).

My husband and I have great sex, I have NO complaints in this area! But I have begun to wonder if sometimes he actually has a climax. He seems to, but something is odd. I don’t know why I’m wondering this, it’s just in my mind, and it’s incredibly awkward for me! Should I talk to him? P.S. He’s 34 and I’m 41 and we’ve been married 14 months. First marriages for both of us.

I told you it was weird. Hope you have some advice.” ~ Jessie

Hi, Jessie (not your real name)! I’m so glad you messaged me because I have no doubt in my mind that you’re not the only woman who has ever wondered about this.

We tend to think that an orgasm is fairly simple, ordinary process for guys. Get erection, apply friction, and (pretty soon) The End.

Not necessarily.

You won't guess what these men said about their hottest night of lovemaking EVER

Revolutionary Sex expert Alex Allman studied thousands of men, single and in relationships, and asked them to remember their hottest night of lovemaking ever… and then asked them: “What made it so hot?”

Watch the Video: Find out what MEN said was their hottest night of lovemaking ever

lovemakingThe answers tell a VERY DIFFERENT story about what men really want, what they say makes a woman “great in bed,” and what drives them crazy between the sheets than anything you’ve ever read before.

(Hint: it’s NOT about clothing, or threesomes, or anything embarrassing… it’s a bit of a “reverse” shocker, actually.)

How many men will admit to faking it?

In a 2012 survey of 49,000 men (and 1,000 women) conducted by AskMen.com, 34% of the men said they’d faked it at least once. (In case you’re wondering, 63% of the women had, too… )

And c’mon, it’s an easy enough thing to fake, right? All he has to do is use a condom (which is quickly thrown away) or make sure there’s enough bodily fluids inside you already that he’s safe from discovery.

WHY would a guy fake his climax?

Here’s why I think a guy will pretend he came – and brace yourself, because these are very similar to the reasons women fake it too:

1. He might fake his climax because he doesn’t want you to feel bad.

You’re both in a vulnerable situation. He wants you to have a great time, and doesn’t want the awkward attention or sympathy you might turn his way if he can’t climax.

2. He might fake his climax because he wants to feel manly.

And manly men ejaculate. Right? Seriously, have you looked at mainstream p*rn recently?

3. He might fake his climax because he’s had too much alcohol (or other drugs) to ejaculate for real.

Well, you knew this one.

4. He might fake his climax because it’s taking too long and he wants it to end.

Wait. Does this guy even exist?

I suspect that this particular scenario doesn’t happen often, given the statistic experts keep giving us that the average duration of intercourse (just the in-and-out bit, not including foreplay) is 3 to 7 minutes. Who are those “experts” anyway?? They’re all over the interwebs, and they are such a sad bunch.

5. He might fake his climax because he’s bored, distracted, tired, stressed, or sleepy.

And I’m not talking about Snow White’s dwarves, either.

6. He might fake his climax because he came earlier. Maybe one too many times today.

Guys who already ejaculated one or more times during the day – while watching p*rn, or, I dunno, preparing tax reports – may have difficulty in producing yet another round of fireworks.

So yeah, maybe your guy DID fake his climax.

He wouldn’t be the only one. And it’s probably not a huge deal, unless you think it’s happening a whole lot. Based on your message, it sounds like it may have happened before but it’s not how things usually go.

Should you mention it to him?

bedroom funNah, I wouldn’t; at least not at this point. You’re still new to each other – barely more than a year into your marriage. You said the sex is awesome, and that’s a great thing to have!

My guess is that he wants very much to make the woman of his dreams intensely, profoundly, shout-out-loud happy in bed, and holy hump-bunnies, who wouldn’t be thrilled with that?

I think eventually he will relax, and you both will feel more secure with each other.

Meanwhile, enjoy each other like you’re already doing! Let him know how much you appreciate his careful attention to your pleasure. I’m sure you’re giving him pleasure as well.

The world needs plenty more of that, right?

Got wisdom to add?

Do you think a guy will really will fake his climax? Why or why not? Take a sec and leave a comment below and add your voice to the conversation!

xoxo Claire

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3 comments on “Will a Man Actually Fake His Climax?

  1. Claire I’ve been with my boyfriend now.for 14 months when we got together I Thaught the reason he didn’t finish at times was he wasn’t in to me then he moved in with me in a matter of 2weeks knowing each other (yah I’m a special kind of.stupid) anyway my issue is has 5yrs older than me and when we are in bed he just wants to get on then off no foreplay no kissing no nothing and I’ve.told him lets try other things toys different positions but he says its nasty and he has only two position missionary and doggystyle which I hate cuz it makes me feel like he can’t finish looking at me I my self like eye contact and he don’t he is a acholic a bad one at that he has told me I’m too fat for him I don’t know.if all his mental abuse is because what he says is true or he’s just drunk but I’m at the point of eathier cheating or breaking it off I’m not getting younger has 50 I’m 45 I think he should know something hes cheated no proof but I feel it and I can’t do oral becaus do think ewe if he was switch someone eles and because he don’t DO it to me there is nothing I don’t know.what to do I love him but I think he’s just not into me ?????

    • Claire Casey

      Hey there, Rebecca. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. And your situation sounds pretty awful. The sex is bad, he doesn’t seem to care what’s good or pleasurable for you, he’s addicted, and he’s mean to you. Why on earth are you still with this guy? 🙁 I hope you’ll find the strength and courage you need to break free, so that you can find the life and love you deserve… xoxo

  2. Rebecca Caballero

    Well.ive recently just started not caring on what he thinks does or who he is with our life together is love hate I do love him.or least I think I do you see I’m looking my house of 11 years cuz my husband not the guy in this post decided to be a pig and touch my kid well he’s on the run but see I will be homeless the first time in my life and my family won’t help me even thou I help them all the time I want to.get back on my feet and forget about all this tragic stuff that has happen in my life and I don’t care if he’s around or not he asked for sex I sat no and stand my ground he says ill get someone eles uh news flash please do I’m getting irrataed with everything about him and when this happens we know what’s next and I’m not the type of person to hide it I would usually get another guy like I did with my husband and moved him right in and my husband to the couch but this time I think I have. To take time for me and figure out what I want he love is toxic and I’m alone all the time so might as well stay that way if I can do it thanks for answering me m

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