Things are bad enough that you want to leave him. But if you aren’t feeling 100% SURE that’s the right choice, you should know…
MANY relationships can be improved (or saved!) if even ONE of the partners is willing to ask the right questions, look for the right answers, and work toward a solution that will heal, and give hope for the future…
He makes me want to leave him. Do I have ANY other option?
“Hey Claire, I’ve been in a relationship with a guy for 10 years, but I don’t know where this is going. He only communicates with me whenever it’s convenient for him.
Last Thursday we were supposed to meet. I texted him in the morning to ask where and when and he texted back saying that he was sleeping. I waited for his call/text but there wasn’t any. He never said sorry nor did he let me know why he couldn’t meet me.
He has disappeared many times before too.
Last time he stopped talking because of some stress at work. He never tells me what he’s stressing about. He says he doesn’t want to depend on anyone that’s why he doesn’t like sharing but I see it as if I’m incapable of sharing his stress and to make him feel better.
We both are very serious about each other and are willing to marry but if he continues not sharing his problems with me and disappearing for long stretches, how on earth are we even going to have a long lasting marriage?
I spoke to him about it but there was no conclusion found because he told me that he would never want to cut off from me and he would always want me with him, but he’s not doing what he said he would. Instead he’s doing just the opposite. I’ll talk to him again, but as of now I haven’t heard anything from him. Not even a single text.
I can’t take this behavior of his anymore. He makes me want to leave him and forget him completely. Or is there any other way out? Please let me know.” — S.
Ten years! Oh honey, this is a painful one, isn’t it?
It sounds like you have been trying for SO LONG to get this to work, and yet he continues to cause you to feel unheard and unloved…
It sounds like the first issue here is communication.
You don’t have to know what he’s doing every second of his life, but you should know most days where he is and generally what’s going on in his life.
If his boss is giving him a hard time about something, you know. Not all the gory details, but simply that he’s struggling and stressed. So that you can offer your support and love.
If he has way more work that he can manage, you know. Not because you want to “fix” anything for him, but because you care how his life is moving along.
If the two of you were married, these things would be particularly important because your finances would depend on it. That’s not the kind of thing you want to be completely in the dark about.
By the way, sharing details like this on a daily and weekly basis is pretty normal for most couples. You’re not asking for something bizarre or unusual.
You CAN bring back that love and devotion you felt for one another when both of you said “I love you” for the first time... Here's How
There’s also a lack of respect & accountability.
If the two of you are supposed to meet, and he leaves you stranded (because he is sleeping or busy or whatever), he’s not showing any respect whatsoever for your time.
His words and actions are telling you, “What I want is important, but what you want is not.”
It’s no wonder you want to leave him. Even among long-term couples this sort of thing happens once in a while, but it shouldn’t be a constant feature of your relationship.
In addition, when a man disappears for long stretches of time with no explanation for the woman he supposedly loves, then (again) he’s showing that what she feels has no importance to him.
If you talk to him about it and he just makes excuses, that shows further disrespect.
When it’s so bad it makes you want to leave him, it just can’t be swept under the rug by him saying things like “But I want us always to be together.”
He can’t just SAY pretty words, he needs to LIVE them out, too.
Even if he says, “I’m sorry,” it doesn’t mean much if he never makes it right (i.e., by NOT doing that thing again). A good man’s actions should MATCH his words (and his beliefs).
Your needs are important just like his are. It can’t always be about him. You deserve better.
I can tell you’re at the end of your rope. You want to leave him. Which means you two need to make significant progress quickly.
You don’t want to waste another 10 years of your life waiting and hoping for a man who isn’t interested in the same things you are.
If you can get professional help, do it! And don’t “settle” for the first therapist you find. Keep hunting until you find one you feel secure and confident with.
And please SERIOUSLY consider this program for help (it is FAR less expensive than an in-person therapist):
I know you want to leave him, but you CAN save your relationship (and it’s worth fighting for)
This is incredibly valuable help for anyone who wants to salvage, heal, and renew ANY serious relationship (even if you’re not married).
The truth is that I wish I could convince EVERY couple experiencing a relationship crisis to watch this video…
Because the strategies Brad Browning reveals in it are extremely powerful and can be the difference between “unhappy and broken-up” and “happily ever after.”
You can actually apply these techniques on your own, without him even being aware that you’re making an effort to save the relationship.
EVENTUALLY it takes two to heal things, but Brad shows you how YOU can begin the repairs, and get them to the point where suddenly you’ll find that BOTH of you are FINALLY working together.
- So don’t lose hope if the problems have been persistent for YEARS
- Don’t lose hope because it’s so bad you want to leave him
- Don’t lose hope if your boyfriend or spouse refuses to attend counseling
- Don’t lose hope if EITHER of you feels too discouraged or overwhelmed
- And DEFINITELY don’t lose hope if your man won’t put in the effort to fix the problems that are slowly eating away at your relationship
There’s no catch to it, no gimmicks…
At the very least, you should watch the first few minutes where Brad reveals the 3 “Marriage Murdering Mistakes”…
These 3 massive myths alone are a huge reason why nearly half of all marriages end in divorce.
I don’t care what mistakes EITHER of you have made, YOU, beautiful one, deserve lifelong, dependable, all-encompassing love.
And begin salvaging the most important thing in the world: real love.
PS: If you’re reading this now, then chances are your relationship isn’t what it used to be… and maybe it’s so bad that you want to leave him. Maybe you feel like your world is falling apart.
- You feel like all the passion, the love, and romance have completely faded.
- You feel like the intimacy will never come back to your relationship.
- You feel like you and your guy can’t stop fighting with each other.
- And maybe you feel that there’s almost nothing you can do to save your relationship, no matter how hard you try.
But you’re wrong.
PPS: One more thing. Even if you’re in a NEWER relationship and things are fine, you should still watch Brad’s video.
Because it shares the three “relationship killing” mistakes that most couples make.
You should at least come away with valuable information that could save your existing AND future relationships.
Don’t forget: even though Brad’s talking about “marriages,” this is still true for ANY relationship that you want to eventually become serious and long term.