Breakups and Recovery Dating and Romance

Why it MAY NOT BE TRUE if he says “I’m not interested in a relationship right now”

Men frequently say they’re not interested in a relationship. Do they really mean it? And if not, why do they say it?

Is he REALLY “not interested in a relationship right now”?

“Hi Claire… When a guy says, “I just got out of a 5 year thing with someone and I’m not looking for a relationship”, does he always stick to it (mean it)?” — Delana

Hi Delana, thanks for taking the time to message. It’s a good question, and I’ve gotten it many times so I know there are a lot of women out there experiencing this from men.

5 reasons men say “I’m not looking for a relationship right now”

When a man tells you he’s not interested in a relationship, it MIGHT be true, but it might not. He might be playing one of 5 “cards” here…

250x250-monogamy-31. The Pity Card

He’s telling you he’s not interested, just broke up, etc., because he hopes to get some tasty-sweet woman-sympathy. It’s an attention thing.

Playing this card might even get him some “poor brokenhearted baby” sex.

Which could develop into regular bootie calls.

WARNING. You probably already know that women tend to hope that bootie calls will turn into a deeper relationship. Men don’t.

2. The “Screening for Bootie Calls” Card

This one is a version of the truth. He’s NOT interested in a “relationship,” but he IS interested in sex.

See the above warning.

3. The “I’m in Control” Card

He tells you this IN CASE he might want to date you.

You’ve backed off, so now he gets to call all the shots if he decides he wants to.

4. The “Easy Exit” Card

Once he’s told you he’s not interested he can freely make a play for you, and you’re all off-balance. (He’s in control.)

So if you date for a while or even sleep together, and then he decides he’s ready to move on, he has a ready-made exit excuse.

He can quickly and easily put all the responsibility for “misunderstanding” on you.

“Hey,” he can casually say, “I TOLD you I wasn’t interested in a relationship.”

5. The Truth

Yep, some guys say it because it’s true.

And some guys say it because it’s true, then change their minds and decide to date.

How to RESPOND to his “I’m not interested” speech

Take him at his word.

Assume he’s telling the gospel truth, and leave him alone.

This means you move forward with your life, immediately. Date other men and don’t put your universe on hold in hopes that something might develop with this guy.

Can you be “friends” even if he’s not interested in more?

ONLY if you don’t behave like a girlfriend or a bootie call.

Don’t date him and don’t sleep with him.

Be clear that if he’s interested in dating you, then your outings have to be actual dates, not “let’s watch Netflix at my place then have sex” or “I need to fill some social gaps” or “you’re the only one available, so why not.”

You’re worth so much more than that.

If the two of you are “just friends,” that means you are still casually dating other men and whole-heartedly pursuing your gorgeous life.

No more”mixed messages” from wishy-washy men…

As a woman, two of your most important needs are to feel SAFE and SECURE. (This is basic human biology.)

And nothing makes you feel LESS secure than being with a man who isn’t communicating clearly, or who is acting “wishy-washy” about his feelings for you…

…A man who can’t seem to commit himself to clarity, a relationship, or even some emotional availability.

–> Here’s how you can trigger a CLEAR “commitment” instinct

Watch this now and you’ll learn a simple, scientifically proven secret that has the power to make ANY man instantly change his ways and shower you with the love, affection and loyalty that you want and deserve.

Interested Man MM

This program is PACKED with great information and helpful tips on helping him GET CLEAR, and FEEL READY TO COMMIT. Including…

It doesn’t matter if you’re single right now. It doesn’t matter if you’re dating a guy. And it doesn’t matter if you’ve been married for years.

This will cause him to feel a rush of joy, nervousness and excitement every time he is with you…as he suddenly sees YOU as the woman he is MEANT to be with!

–> This “monogamy method” secret really is THAT powerful…

PS: PLEASE DON’T use this to break up a man’s marriage, or to mess with some guy’s
mind because he did you wrong in the past. You should ONLY use this incredibly powerful secret on a man who you want (or have) a loving, lasting, committed relationship with.

xoxo Claire

5 comments on “Why it MAY NOT BE TRUE if he says “I’m not interested in a relationship right now”

  1. Hi Claire, I have taken your advice and stopped communicating with my ‘friend with benefits’ who doesn’t want a relationship. In 2 weeks he has messaged me 4 times and has asked twice if I want to go for lunch or dinner with him soon.
    Remember he said a few weeks ago that he doesn’t want to date me but wants to continue what we used to do all the time – dinner and lunch at least 3 times a week.
    How do I proceed?
    He is one of my best friends.
    I am feeling better and back to my confident self but I do miss our friendship…

    • Claire Casey

      It’s really up to YOU, S. Do you want to be “friends with benefits” with him? You get to decide what you want in your life, soulshine…

  2. hey Claire , I would like to share my story with you and I may need some advice .
    So we are seing each other for a year now , we see each other almost everyday I know his family but we re not together yet he say that he’s not ready for a relationship but the thing is that we do everything like a couple we are always together and he gets mad when i see other guys ,he knows that I love him and yet he say that he’s not ready for a relationship . I really love him and I wanna be his I really don’t know what to do thank you for your help

    • Claire Casey

      Hey, there H.

      If your guy says he’s “not ready for a relationship” the best thing to do is believe him.

      You certainly don’t have to stop being friends with this guy, but if what you want is a committed relationship, then keep dating other men and looking for one who wants the same thing you do, beautiful.

      You deserve this!

      xoxo Claire

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Are you ready to FINALLY have Real, Primal, Lasting Love?

Are you ready to FINALLY have Real, Primal, Lasting Love?

STOP letting men CONFUSE you, and start getting the love you dream of and deserve.

Sign up and get my Free "Love Number" Book and EXPERT ADVICE now! 

You're in, gorgeous! Go check your email for a confirmation.